little.lulu.

mitchtime:

hono-lulu:

We suspect one of the family cats was poisoned by the new mean neighbor. Of course there is no evidence of this but she (vet) did say ingested something toxic and went blind and basically couldnt move, in a matter of 2 days. The vet kept her and were waiting for the bloodwork to come back but since she was doing so so bad they had to put her to sleep.

I grieve quietly and alone. Thats the way I deal with things. Sometimes I don’t cry at all even when I want and sometimes I cry waterfalls when I don’t want to.

My mom grieves openly and loudly. Just a little while ago she was outside on the street crying hysterically. I feel terrible but part of me wanted to say please go inside.

I’m supposed to have a mini bonfire tonight though I now don’t feel much like celebrating. After a fight last nite with my mom that sent her stomping away crying accusing me of not believing in God, having back to back dr appts Thursday and Friday, one of which I am still bleeding from, awkward convos with a particular guy, and one of my favorite cats dying today, I’m a little exhausted. I may end up drunk tonight and hopefully I don’t see the neighbor walk by while Im in a drunken stupor and hurl accusations at that bastard.

*hang in there…

Thank you! I’m feeling better and it means a lot to me when ppl show they care. happy Saturday :)